Married since past three months …..Clueless and baffled by the mute subscription of millions of females in our country and on the other hand having an exaggerated self opinion i didn’t .:)….Not that that i had to run the gauntlet to achieve the same but still puffed up just because i didn’t yield to the lines of male descent .I know that now some robust minded people would look down upon me for my inanity of trying to project myself as a revolutionary female who is trying hard to knock down the patriarchy but nescient that by sticking to her maiden surname still is an upholder of the same patrileneal tradition.Yes, compatriots i am very much aware of this fact that i am still a campaigner of patrilineal traditions of carrying the father’s surname but couldn’t find a rescue in taking up my mother’s surname since she also adopted it from her father and so it won’t clear up the confusion anyhow nor would i propose to simply do away with the system altogether since it’s highly impracticable and unreasonable(No intent to give hand to caste system .:)
Personally ,i am quite okay with the tradition of inheriting the surname of one’s father which is out and out a patrilineal practice but not so bitter as is the case with the surname change drill that takes place post marriage .Logic behind such acceptance being that the parent(be it the father or mother)is someone who cultivates the individual ,is responsible for the rearing of the child and also some one from whom a child acquire her/his identity .Hence, adopting the surname of any of the two parents should be an acceptable practice anywhere round the globe(this also suggests adopting the mother’s surname should also be a welcomed practice).
But what makes me disquieted is the practice of adopting the husband’s surname after marriage.Of course many traditionalist would argue that this is done in order to ward off ambiguity and maintain uniformity .It also reflects the acceptability ,adaptability ,submissiveness and sacrificing nature of the woman(Oh! yes sacrifice even to the extent of changing one’s identity ,and why not?after all it’s so facile as the principal constituent of identity for a female comprises of her outward appearance which goes through a whole lot of metamorphosis post marriage)however none of the above rationale convince me and nor does the practice of name joining .
For most it’s highly impossible to conceive this thought to the fullest ,since in the middle of the deliberation process they would be impregnated with opinions about the proposer as to having irrational resistance to rational standards .
Image courtesy twitter
Neha Raghuvanshi 